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Broken Bread and Poured Out Wine

kathydoremus — Sun, 09 May 2010 12:37:30 +0000

This morning I read the passage in Matthew 14 where Jesus feeds the hungry crowd with such meager resources. He nourishes more than five thousand people with a few loaves of bread and a couple of fish, and they all leave satisfied. Really, it doesn’t matter what the food was or how much of it they started with, does it? What matters is that it was ALL placed in Jesus’ hands to bless, to break, and to do with as He pleased. This always encourages me since when I look at myself I don’t feel like I have much to offer, yet I can take comfort knowing that if I place myself entirely in my Saviors hands (knowing that He will both bless me and lovingly break me) He will use me to nourish others.
Several years ago, as I was meditating on this same passage, song lyrics came to me which I now pass along to you:

“Broken Bread and Poured Out Wine”

I place myself in Your hands
Do with me as You please
Oh, close to You, there’s no other place I’d rather be.
And I give You all I am
Though meager may it be
Surrendered ‘til I find at least that I’m finally free
And all I ever want to be…

Is broken bread and poured out wine
A longing heart that’s cleansed of pride
A vessel where Your glory shines
Is all I want to be…
A witness to Your faithfulness
Where You increase as I grow less
Oh, poured out wine and broken bread
Is all I want to be…it’s all I want to be

Until my journey here is done
Won’t You help me seek Your face?
I come to You, and I’m so hungry for a deeper taste
Of Your mercy and Your love
Of Your goodness and Your grace
Lord, take my life and let it overflow with endless praise
And may I be for all my days…

Broken bread and poured out wine
A longing heart that’s cleansed of pride
A vessel where Your glory shines
That’s all I want to be…
A witness to Your faithfulness
Where You increase as I grow less
Poured out wine and broken bread
It’s all I want to be…It’s all I ever want to be…

Thirsty

kathydoremus — Sat, 27 Feb 2010 16:12:48 +0000

“Thirsty”

Jesus, I’m drowning, in a sea of circumstances.
Savior, please help me, on my own don’t like my chances
Turn my heart and lift my eyes
Draw me near and hear my cries
For You are where my only hope is.

Jesus, I’m thirsty, the things of earth have left me empty
Savior, I’m longing, with Your living water fill me
My soul is parched, my spirit’s dry
Once again I realize
That You alone can satisfy me

Chorus:
Oh, come and rescue me
From everything that hinders me
From finding my delight in Thee
God of all sufficiency
This I ask for all my days
Keep me close and fix my gaze
On the beauty of Your face
Oh, God of such amazing grace

Jesus, I’m running, to Your open arms of mercy
Savior, please hold me, and let these blinded eyes see clearly
With all the ways Your glory shines
Come penetrate this heart of mine
With Your words of truth restore me

Repeat chorus

Jesus, I’m thirsty…
Jesus, I’m thirsty…

I Want To See Your Glory

kathydoremus — Sun, 20 Dec 2009 13:30:17 +0000

In the hustle and bustle of the Christmas season, may we not lose sight of the truth that His glory is what we truly long for – nothing else, and nothing less will satisfy us.

I Want To See Your Glory

I want to see Your glory, Lord, open up my eyes
to Your majesty, for I realize
that the things of earth and the pleasures here
are a fading mist soon to disappear.
Oh, soon they will disappear

I want to see Your glory, Lord, let Your splendor shine.
All I am is Yours; all You are is mine.
What the world would gain leads to emptiness.
Let me find my joy in Your radiance.
Oh, my joy’s in Your radiance.

Chorus:
Oh, the depths of Your wisdom
Oh, the breadth of Your love
Mercy beyond description
Raining down from above
Uncontainable riches
Unexplainable ways
Immanuel – God is with us
Undeniable grace…undeniable grace

I want to see Your glory, Lord, hear my desperate cry.
Let me drink from You, or I’m sure to die.
For this thirst within is such a pleasing pain -
it leads my longing soul to seek Your face again.
Oh, I’ll seek Your face again.

repeat chorus

I want to see Your glory, Lord, open up my eyes
I want to see Your glory, Lord, let Your splendor shine
I want to see Your glory, Lord, hear my desperate cry
For Your glory, Lord…it’s all about Your glory, Lord.

Astonish Me With Your Majesty

kathydoremus — Mon, 26 Oct 2009 16:46:44 +0000

Lyrics for October…

“Astonish Me With Your Majesty”

Awaken me from my slumber
Astonish me with Your majesty
Fill my heart with wonder
Oh, Spirit come and ravish me -
With love I cannot fathom
And mercy robed in mystery
You’re more than I can imagine
Open up my eyes to see

Chorus:
That nothing in this world could ever captivate my soul
And heaven’s only heaven ’cause You’re there
I was made to stand amazed at who You really are
To marvel at Your worth beyond compare
To marvel at Your worth beyond compare
Oh, heaven’s only heaven ’cause You’re there

Lead me out of this darkness
Rescue me from my empty ways
Heal my heart of its hardness
Oh, Jesus full of truth and grace -
Almighty Rock and Refuge
My shelter’s underneath Your wings
Don’t let me stray from Your presence
And forever I will gladly sing

repeat chorus

Send forth Your light and truth and lead me to the place
Where every lesser thing’s consumed by the beauty of Your face
Send forth Your holiness and bring me to my knees
With majesty and glory, Lord, oh please – astonish me

Awaken me from my slumber
Astonish me with Your majesty
Astonish me with Your majesty

Where Was God?

kathydoremus — Sat, 05 Sep 2009 19:22:01 +0000

Trying to reconcile the sovereignty of God with the suffering of the world is not a light or easy endeavor. It is hard for our minds (and our hearts) to conceive that a God who is loving and good would permit such heartache in the lives of His people. When grappling with this issue, some have resorted to trying to “get God off the hook” by saying that although God did not will the suffering, He was unable to intervene because of man’s free will. Such thinking indeed shrinks God to a more manageable size, but it flies in the face of the sovereignty that Scripture so clearly portrays. Besides that, a small God is of little comfort to one who has faced great agony.

While we may try to excuse God, He takes full responsibility for the tears and the trials that He allows to touch our lives. In Isaiah 45:6-7, God says, “That men may know from the rising to the setting of the sun that there is no one besides Me. I am the LORD, and there is no other, the One forming light and creating darkness, causing well-being and creating calamity; I am the LORD who does all these.”

At the risk of sounding simplistic, perhaps it is safe to say that God’s desires for our lives differ from our own. He knows that a shallow life, void of trial and full of counterfeit pleasures, will never satisfy our souls. We were made for so much more. Perhaps the painful circumstances that are a part of our past (or our present) were designed by God as a means to giving us more of His glory – which in the end, will bring us great joy.

On a personal note - a couple of years ago, a friend shared her life story with me, which included sexual abuse that she had experienced as a young girl. As I listened to all that she had gone through, it made me wrestle with the kind of thoughts that I just wrote about in the earlier paragraphs. The following lyrics flowed as a result -

Where Was God?

Only ten, what a tender age
for dreams to be broken and trust betrayed.
Like a flower picked before the petals opened,
hope lay shattered as her youth was stolen.
Where was God when her innocence died?
Was His ear turned deaf to a little girls cries?

Time marches on but the scars remain
with layers of life now to veil the shame.
Like a private poison buried out of sight
that haunts her dreams in the dark of night.
Where is God, has He hidden His face?
Does He even care how her heart still aches?

Chorus:
Oh, there’s no easy answers in this life we’re given
Deep calls to deep on this side of heaven
Treasures in darkness, and beauty from ashes
The thief of our joy is the servant of our gladness
And He never turns away
His mercy will not fail
It’s a mystery so great
I know His purpose will prevail…oh, He will prevail

Now she’s grown in wisdom as she’s grown in years
She knows in her sorrow that He counted her tears
And the wounds weren’t wasted though words can’t explain
How His glory’s revealed in the midst of her pain
Where is God? She knows His presence is near
‘Cause His perfect love is bringing freedom from fear.

Only ten…where was God?
I know His purpose will prevail.

Cry For Mercy

kathydoremus — Fri, 10 Jul 2009 13:20:11 +0000

Cry For Mercy

Go and learn what this means – it’s mercy I desire
The offerings you bring, are not what I require
I’m weary of your sacrifice
Of empty words and calloused lives
Oh, bring me no more alibis
Go and learn what this means

Come and hear what I say – you’ve been blinded by your pride
Drop the masquerade, I know who you are inside
You’ve trusted in what cannot save
You’ve looked to fallen flesh for praise
With hardened hearts and rebel ways
Come and hear what I say

Chorus:
Cry aloud for mercy – I will hear you, I will hear you
I’m calling to you, how long must I wait?
Come broken in My presence – I will heal you, I will heal you
Come wash your stains in endless streams of grace

Lift your eyes once again – stand in awe and be amazed
You’ve forgotten who I am, “Holy, Holy” is my Name
Have you not seen? Have you not heard?
My glory fills the universe
Be still and marvel at my worth
Lift your eyes once again

repeat chorus

In quietness and trust is your salvation
In repentance and in rest lies your strength
I’m the only One who can save you
Rend your heart, My child, don’t turn away

repeat chorus

Go and learn what this means…

All I Am For Only You

kathydoremus — Sat, 13 Jun 2009 12:27:45 +0000

This song flowed from a conversation I had with some friends a couple of weeks ago, in which we spoke of how we have a longing in our hearts for God but foolishly turn to other places to try and find satisfaction. I share these lyrics both as a confession that I am not yet who I want to be, and as a prayer that I would increasingly and unreservedly surrender all that I am to my Savior.

All I Am For Only You

In this world, my heart’s divided in a thousand pieces
A soul in fragments trying to believe that
You’re everything I need
In my life, I’ve been given to an endless line of lovers
Faithless, yet I’m starting to discover
You’re everything I need
Help me believe
Break the walls and loose the chains
Bring sight to blinded eyes again
Cleanse my heart and tear the ties
to lesser loves, expose the lies
Bind me to the only One who’s true
All I am, oh God, for only You
All I am for only You

In this world, with subtle pride I’ve tried to build my kingdom
I thought the praise of man would be my freedom
But You’re all I need
In my life, I’ve settled for a glory that is fading
While mercy stood with open arms there waiting
To be all I need
Help me believe
Lead me to the wilderness ’til I repent and I confess
That nothing that this world provides can fill my soul or satisfy
Bind me to the only One who’s true
All I am, oh God, for only You
All I am for only You

All I am is Yours
All You are is mine
Amazing love – what better could I find?
Bind me to the only One who’s true
All I am, oh God, for only You
All I am for only You

Breathless

kathydoremus — Sun, 03 May 2009 14:05:44 +0000

These lyrics came this past week as I contemplated how each day is a battle to believe God and find my joy in Him. Each day I am surrounded by other gods that tell me lies and distract me, claiming that they are the answer to my soul’s hunger. The voices are loud and persistent, but I know that there is only One God – and that He alone is everything my soul longs for.

Breathless

The gods of my own making
have eyes but cannot see
with deafened ears that cannot hear
and mouths that cannot speak
And the gods of my own making
are powerless to save
They tell me lies, and can’t provide
the promises they make
Empty and useless, they’re leaving me helpless
Why can’t I see that they’re stealing my life from me?
Weak and so worthless, they’re broken and breathless
When will I see that they’re stealing my life from me?
And if I make them I’ll be like them
If I trust them I will fail
If I listen they’ll deceive me
To enslave me is their will…oh, to enslave me is their will

The God who made the heavens
is the Lord of all the earth
With power and might, He’s clothed in light
and infinite in worth
And the God who made the heavens
has engraved me on His hands
He cannot fail, His love prevails
His promises will stand
His beauty is boundless, His glory is endless
How can it be that He’s given His life for me?
His majesty’s matchless, He’s leaving me breathless
How can it be that He’s given His life for me?
There’s no other god beside Him
If I trust Him I won’t fail
I must listen and believe Him
for my freedom is His will…oh, my freedom is His will

Worthy is the Lord, Almighty
Holy, Holy is His Name
Praise to God alone ascribing
All for the glory of our King

Your majesty’s matchless
You’re leaving me breathless
It’s all for the glory of my King
All for the glory of my King

Near To Me

kathydoremus — Sat, 11 Apr 2009 00:03:15 +0000

These lyrics came as I sat on a deck overlooking Lake Lure and reflected on who God is and on how I desire to know Him more deeply than I do.

Near To Me

Almighty God – I long for You
In this dry and barren place
My heart and flesh cry out for You
Don’t turn from me Your face
For Your steadfast love is better than the air I breathe
Come penetrate into the deepest part of me.

Almighty God – come rescue me
My heart is prone to stray
I give myself to lesser loves
Why do I turn away -
When You bid me drink until my soul is satisfied
You clothe me with Your splendor, and claim me as Your bride

chorus:
Oh God, I need to see Your glory once again
I need to be reminded of Your majesty
I cling to the cross, the only covering for my sin
I need to know Your presence as reality
Oh God, be near to me
Oh God, be near to me

Almighty God – come take my life
For I’m not fit to reign
May Christ be what it means to live
And death become my gain
For my days are quickly fading like the morning mist
So capture me with cords of grace I can’t resist

repeat chorus